I get this email newsletter put out by David DeAngelo that touts his “Double Your Dating” portfolio of tricks on how men can meet women more effectively. I admit that I usually read the whole thing. Why? The guy is a genius at understanding human nature and ways of putting that understanding to work.
There are numerous parallels between what he describes in his world and the world of recruiting. In fact, a recent subject was on how women test men. I made it my own as to how “testing” applies to sourcing. Here are my tips on winning over the Gatekeeper if you regularly get tested yourself.
Do you routinely call companies only to have the Gatekeeper ask, “Who’s calling, and what is this call in regard to?” Has a Gatekeeper ever asked you if you’re a recruiter? Have you ever been challenged on the “excuse” you offered about why you’re calling? Have you ever had a Gatekeeper call you back and ask why you needed certain information?
Do would-be customers tell you, “Give me your number and I’ll call you”? Have you ever had a customer insult your work and/or integrity as an excuse not to pay you or to pay you for less than he originally contracted for? Have you ever had a “hard-to-please” customer who, no matter how many hoops you jump through, remains acrimonious?
Guess what? You were being tested!
People “test” each other to see how much control they have and, consequently, to see how strong you are. The paradox of “testing” is that if you comply with what the tester seems to want, you will usually FAIL the test.
There are ways to answer the tests and come out on top, but only if you can learn to master your own human nature. First, listen to what’s being said in the silences.
People test each other because they need to quickly understand what they’re dealing with, and some of them are not very nice about it. The fact of the matter is, though some of us may talk a very big game, far less of us can back it up.
What people are looking for in other people is character and personal identity. Do you have it?
People generally don’t want to hang around with people they can push around. There’s that paradox thing again. To cut to the chase, some of us can be pretty brutal ferreting out the losers from the winners. How does one tell the difference between the winners and the losers?
We ask. If there is any shade of doubt presented, we ask for further clarification. We ask so we may cipher out the strength and confidence from the weak and defeated. And, of course, we test in a way that doesn’t necessarily indicate testing.
Testing gives you power, and that’s why sourcers “test” all the time. We test the temperature of the Gatekeeper immediately; we test our customers or our hiring managers to see how much push-back they will take; we test ourselves constantly.
We recognize the incoming test and we know how to deal with it, or more concretely, we know how to avoid it altogether.
When you call that company and the Gatekeeper says, “Hello, thank you for calling Great Big Corporation. My name is Sheila, may I help you?” you say, “Yes, Sheila, I hope so. My name is Maureen Sharib, can you please tell me who?”
What have I done? I’ve removed the mystery upfront. I told her who I was and what I wanted. I guarantee you, this one thing, identifying yourself upfront, is the single most powerful tool in a telephone sourcer’s arsenal.
If you tell her who you are, she is not likely to ask you what your business is in calling. Make sense? If you don’t believe me, try it!
After you’ve explained your supposed mission repeatedly, and you can feel your tongue tied up in knots inside your mouth, she asks, “Are you a recruiter?”
So what have you done wrong? Yes, that’s right; you’ve said way too much. Hang up, shorten things drastically, and get back on the phone.
Has your phone ever rung mid-afternoon only to hear a familiar voice on the other end ask, “This is Sheila from Great Big Corporation. You called me this morning and said you were calling from our Dallas office. I called our Dallas office and you’re not listed in their directory; in fact, you’re not listed in our global directory. My boss wants to know why you needed our corporate directory e-mailed to you.”
I’m not going to go there; you know what you did wrong.
Have you ever had a Gatekeeper say, “I don’t believe you”? It happens, and it usually happens when you don’t believe yourself or in yourself.
Perhaps she says, “Give me your email address and I’ll e-mail you the info,” or “Give me your number and I’ll call you back.” This is happening because you’re not strong enough directing her to do what you want her to do. She feels the need to “test” you and you’ve let it happen by not being the one in control of the conversation.
I recently was an invited guest speaker on phone sourcing on Wachovia’s twice-quarterly “Community of Practice,” put on by their recruiting organization. The message of the Community of Practice is to provide shared knowledge and information regarding what is being done, each as individuals and as team members of Wachovia’s recruiting organization.
There was a speaker right behind me who said, “Whoever is asking questions is in control of the conversation.” He was speaking about how to speak with the true “passive” candidate, a subject upon which much more needs to be written.
If you allow that Gatekeeper to start asking you questions, you’re lost. You must be able to influence her with your voice, your tone, your attitude, and to comply with your requests.
