Kip Hanson threw his followers for a loop on Tuesday when he photographed his Starbucks coffee and uploaded it to Facebook. Instead of the same venti dark roast with half and half he always posts, Kip’s followers were surprised to see a grande iced caramel frappucino.
“I was shocked,” Kip’s college roommate, Bill, exclaimed. “Kip is usually so reliable. He always gets the dark roast. I’m stunned that he would let me down so casually. And with a frappuccino? That’s just not like him.”
Comments on the posting reflected the widespread disappointment among Kip’s followers. Friends, co-workers, relatives, and people he forgot he had friended registered their dismay at Kip’s beverage post saying things like: “not cool, dude” and “WTF?!!!” or “drinking from the suc-cess-pool!” One of Kip’s college professors sent a private, angry message. It was too stern to post on Kip’s wall.
Kip’s departure from his normal routine has some of his friends suddenly wondering if they ever really knew Kip. Jeff Kelley, Kip’s classmate in the fifth grade, thinks Kip might have been “shining on” for some time now, and this might have been a peek behind the curtain showing what Kip is really like. He now suspects Kip has only been posting the good events of his life and not sharing the whole picture. Jeff says it makes him seem less authentic. “Either that or Kip is so whipped by his hot new girlfriend he thinks he’s dating Giselle and he’s going all ‘Tom Brady’ on her.” Kelley exclaims.
A quick poll of Kip’s followers suggests that many believe his account has been hacked, and they are no longer following the real Kip. While some loyal followers offer half-hearted rationalizations for Kip’s behavior, the number of Kip’s followers have declined since the incident. It is clear they no longer feel the deep sense of intimacy they used to enjoy with Kip on Facebook.
“I mean, he was always there, you know?” Said Kip’s ex-girlfriend, Amanda Blake. “Every time I’d check my FB account I could see that he was still there. He was still Kip. But then that Frappuccino? It’s like, I don’t know, did he really have veal scallopini for dinner on Thursday? Or check in at the gym at 6 a.m. Wednesday? Was he really outraged at the price of gasoline? Maybe he didn’t really ‘like’ my LOL Cat post. Maybe it was all a lie.”
When asked about the uproar, Kip says it’s been a tough lesson, but he now knows who is real ‘friends’ are. He also says he’s using Twitter now and has some new followers. He claims they’re more ‘free-spirited types’ who accept his alternative lifestyle.
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