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Don’t Miss the Psychic Jobs at the End of This Roundup

by Oct 19, 2012, 6:34 am ET

We have finally found the reason why the American economy has been able to do so much with so few employees. Before we explain the roots of this high productivity we need to explain that a new survey shows that “nearly 50% of men are hiring the women they date in this economy.”

Who were the respondents to this survey? None other than 40,000 members of SeekingArrangement.com, which bills itself as “the world’s largest dating website where women seek (the) ‘well-to-do.’” Yes, this totally perfectly clearly scientific report shows that “46% of ‘Sugar Daddies’ have employed, gone into business, or helped start a small business with their ‘Sugar Babies.’”

If we haven’t lost you yet, here’s where we’re at: Men are dating women, then hiring them, but particularly men who are well-to-do, which basically explains why the two of us aren’t hiring anyone. Anyhow, to get to the productivity point here, the survey also shows that “67% of the Sugar Babies felt the need to outperform coworkers or put in extra hours every week when the job opportunity was given by their Sugar Daddies.”

And there you have it. The economy is growing, but the unemployment rate is still stuck around the 8% range, because people are working harder than ever, and now you know why.

Build Your Own Infographic

Remember those long ago days when you first discovered PowerPoint? How wonderful to be able to illustrate those long, boring presentations with interminable slides, packed with words, when they weren’t loaded with jiggling, jumping charts and illustrations.

So cool then. So old school today. Now we have infographics. If you wanta be cool and ahead of the other employer brands, create your own infographic. So many free and online tools are popping up that anyone with a bunch of data and almost no design skills at all can have an infographic of their very own. Infogr.am, Piktochart and Easel.ly are all relatively new. Visual.ly is useful for Facebook and Twitter creations.

We created our graphic out of thin air on Infogr.am. But we kinda think the trajectory of infographics is going to resemble ours, considering how many infographics PR firms and vendors send us these days.

Chief Venting Officer

That last bit on infographics was sort of us venting. But we can do better, especially since five grand is at stake. Yeah, Yeah. We know it’s a PR stunt, and a cheap way to get content, but $5,000 is $5,000.

WerkJerks, an appropriate place for a contest for Chief Venting Officer, is hosting this contest. To get the bucks and the title, you post a 30second video of yourself explaining, “Why do you want to be Chief Venting Officer?” Winner has to work part time for the site for a month, posting to social media and on the WerkJerks blog to get “people to share humorous stories, videos, pictures, and other experiences that poke fun at some of the craziness of today’s work environments.”

So, you ask, What is WerkJerks? It’s what Glassdoor would have been if Jerry Springer, Howard Stern, and Jeff Foxworthy launched it.

Your Future Foretold

CareerCast has this serious, sober look at the “Seven Best Jobs for Paranormal Enthusiasts.” The article lists jobs like psychic, metaphysics professor, sound engineer (for recording ghostly sounds, naturally), and, our favorite, ghost hunter.

One of the founders of the Connecticut Paranormal Research Society observes that “This kind of work isn’t for everybody.”

What’s missing from the article is a link to relevant jobs. So we went looking for some and found a couple listings on Indeed for “ghost hunter” and a bunch for psychics. (Why would you need to advertise for a psychic? Shouldn’t they just know where the jobs are?)

The one we liked best was for an email product manager for a psychic advice service. We found it on CareerBuilder. No salary was provided, but all the usual benefits plus a “fully stocked refrigerator,” on-site yoga classes, and “Free Psychic Readings.”

This article is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to offer specific legal advice. You should consult your legal counsel regarding any threatened or pending litigation.